Just another Status Symbol

mariano-nocetti-716793-unsplashDora hadn’t a clue that her smile was something to be ashamed of. She was in her mother’s car praying it wouldn’t crash as mum was closing some business deals over the phone.

The twelve-year-old was used to watching her being served as some sort of superstar again. It was the orthodontics surgery, and the kids in the waiting room looked as if they were on their way to be slaughtered with no mercy.

“it’s like getting some fashionable jewellery” said mum, in the usual voice she used when lying.

The specialist’s assistant used the words “brave” and “cool” to address Dora as she poked her gums clumsily with some sort of Middle Ages torturing instruments.

Dora thought to herself that all the genuine smiles she had been sharing with other kids, spreading love and connection, was actually a genetic default.

Mum had taken a check book and paid in advance. Dora didn’t get an option.

Like a broken AI that had been causing grief, Dora bared the filth of having four stinky hands – with no gloves- in her tiny mouth at the same time.

 

Not to mention the hygiene conditions. Bracket pieces were pulled out of a box, shoved into her mouth and then back in the box again, over and over again. Of course, her darling mum hadn’t been allowed into the surgery.

 

Dora overheard the orthodontist saying “this procedure will grant your child a lifetime of success opportunities- Dora’s lucky, only the privileged can afford this. The job will be done in eighteen months. Come back every 4 weeks for adjustment. And I will need to remove 4 teeth to make some space, but we’ll talk about that later.”

Once the session was over, mum said “You look so glamorous” and drove Dora around every friend’s home, showing her new teeth the way an old seller would bargain for a horse. She exaggerated the fee she spent threefold to each and every one of them.

One kid looked at Dora with pity and said “My ma would never do that to me.”

Is it right to teach a kid that beauty – if Colgate teeth can be named Beauty- counts more than dental hygiene? Because the bacteria collected during 18 months is enough to kill all the sharks in the London Aquarium.

Not surprisingly mum didn’t keep the adjustment appointments as she was busy “working” and cavities soon began to appear from South to North.

 

When Dora had had enough and was seeing that the result on her smile was “uglier” than it looked at starting point, she resorted to her granny to take her to have them removed. Her mother didn’t even notice the difference: she had completely forgotten about them all.

Dora had also missed a climax moment to get her first kiss.

After the disaster, it took the youngster 8 long years to learn how to smile again without covering her mouth with her right hand.

It seems like we are forgetting- in the human world, difference is so charming.

 

The End.

 

More humour here.

The Other Woman

votenow-2-transI am not the jealous type. But what happened to me last Christmas changed my marriage for good.

I had been suspecting her existence for a couple of months -but I didn’t think twice when I was sent to a Seminar in Manchester for a week: “if he’s got to see her he will anyway “.

My marriage with my teenage love was too perfect and I would even say boring for Her not to appear like a flesh Ghost. I hadn’t mentioned her to anyone, all I did was get myself a small cute notepad in Cards Galore, and tracked down the clues she left behind. I secretly enjoyed this and carried on with my life.

But when I got back from that Manchester Seminar and found he was not home, I thought myself a fool. Instinctively I went through the bedroom and en suite bathroom to find a case left behind.

It was a tablet case… with no tablet. All there was inside was a collection of cards I avidly went through one by one. This woman was spoilt, and popular. All cards said something like “free ” or “gift” on them, and there was a handful of VIP business cards too.

My darker side took hold of me and I quickly went to my little home desk and sat down to find a place to hide the treasure.[sociallocker][/sociallocker]

“Mother Christmas I shall call her”.

Still trembling with excitement I took a quick shower and undid my luggage. Stan had called to say he had a last minute football ticket given by his colleague and would be back home soon.

Nobody ever reclaimed the little “Christmas present ” but the following months were a new beginning thanks to the cards.

I had used one of the Spa vouchers for an egyptian mud treatment which knocked five  years off my skin complexion . I joined a belly dancing group with her membership card and started to enjoy a kind of sex appeal only celebrities can show off. I used the VIP contacts to make my way through a career change.

And best of all, my wardrobe got revamped and Stan said he couldn’t recognize the “new woman ” I had become. So he took me on a second honeymoon where we finally conceived twins.

While we were there on a drunk night by the fireplace, I confessed my little detective book and so he said She was just a woman he was trying to sign a deal with and who lurred him into intimacy. He said he had set her up with the football fan colleague to get rid of her -and now these two were engaged.

Drunk as he was, he showed me a video of her on his phone where she is shouting at a cabbie in Spanish.

“By the way, can I ask you Jennifer – you don’t happen to have a sugar daddy buying you all this expensive sexy underwear, do you?” And I spilled the whiskey on the sheepskin rug….

 

The End

More humour  here !

Sandra’s Tunnel

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Dreams
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This is what I work for.

 

 

 

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Those were the real times.
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I might die- but my tattoo will last forever.
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Wondering if creatures believe in God…
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In quest for the machine of everlasting energy.
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No means No.
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The brief time of glory
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Ideas are delicate
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The reptilian way of crying.

 

 

 

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When something random captures me.
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Diamonds at snack break.
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Pleasure exploading once.
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Is there anyone out there?

 

 

 

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Chewing gum.
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You drilled into my heart.
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The Joy of Water.

 

 

 

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